Chocolate. Wine. Cookies. Chips. Ice cream. Many reach for these foods out of boredom, sadness, anger, and frustration. These foods help to numb, soothe, and provide escape when disappointment with life sets in. Hunger doesn’t drive these cravings, but a desire for nourishment.
Almost every person self-medicates with food at one time or another. In their search for something fulfilling, they try to fill that void with sugar, carbs, or alcohol. And yet, almost every time, they leave feeling unsatisfied and still needing something else.
Sound familiar?
The problem is, when we reach for food to fill that space, we still don’t answer the Big Question: what wants to be nourished? What am I not feeling, experiencing, or embodying in my life right now?
So often when these big questions linger in the back of our minds, it seems easier to reach for the quick fixes and the feel-good tricks we’ve always relied on. But what if we asked ourselves what our mind, body, and spirit really wanted – what amazing things could open up in our lives?
- Is there something to be expressed? A conversation to be had? Something wanting to be created?
- Are you wanting to connect with more – or less – people? Deepening relationships, networking more strategically, or simply seeking fun with new friends?
- Do you have a sense that it’s time to make a change? A shift in health, career, or purpose?
There is a surprising gift to noticing our habits – especially the ones including cravings and compulsions. Reaching for the food and habits delivering short-term comfort often signals discomfort and longing – AND offers a powerful healing opportunity! It is our body’s way of communicating to us exactly what we need.
This is our inner wisdom speaking to us. In today’s fast-paced and quick-fix world, many of us forgot how to listen to our bodies and spirits. We forgot how to listen to what we really want at that moment. So, when we find ourselves self-medicating with tools as simple as food, it might be time to take a step back and listen.
Underneath hunger is usually some area of our life where we need to spend a little more time and energy to live with the purpose and joy we really crave. The next time you find yourself reaching for the cookies or the wine, I invite you to step back and ask yourself these three questions:
- What am I actually feeling right now? Most likely, it’s not physical hunger – look a little deeper.
- What do I want to feel instead?
- What in my life needs to be nourished and supported to feel more connected in this area?
A couple months ago, a conversation with a friend revealed she ate ice cream every night to the point of stomach aches. She realized she felt lonely in her new job, working alone at home without a way to connect with her new co-workers. In the evenings, her kids and husband went off to their activities and events… leaving her alone once again. She comforted herself with ice cream.
She admitted she wanted more connection and laughter in her days. To nourish the relationships in her life, she needed to initiate and invite others into her world with more intention. She planned a social outing for her co-workers – and finally got to meet everyone face to face. She instituted family dinners and weekend downtime for her family to rest, play, and connect on the weekends. She even created a once-a-month neighborhood potluck to get to know the neighbors!
My friend felt lonely and soothed it with ice cream. She craved connection and wanted to nourish the relationships in her life. She made a plan and shifted her habits to make it happen.
I asked her last week how much ice cream she kept in the freezer. None! She made a deal with herself that she would only eat ice cream if she went to an ice cream shop with someone else – no more lonely ice cream nights!
Before your next craving strikes, ask yourself: what wants to be nourished in my life? What craves your time and energy? What would bring more joy and a sense of possibility?
And maybe next time, instead of being a tool to fill the void, that ice cream will be shared in celebration of a well-nourished life!
The founder of Ignite Joy Life-Coaching, Megan Adams is a certified Health, Life, and Transformational Coach trained in High Performance Habits. Megan’s passion empowers women to choose a life they love. No more “going through the motions” or being driven by “shoulds” when a world of possibilities waits to be explored! With curiosity, intention, and a splash of fun Megan helps you explore what your heart yearns for – and then helps you get to work honoring that vision by nurturing your body, mind, and spirit.
